Prophecies of the Ancient Ones

Behold, mortal, the prophecies of the wise and enigmatic prophets of old! Gather 'round and tremble before the decrees of the seers who foresaw the end of all things.

Prophecy 1: "The Great Cheese Shall Rise Again" - A prophecy foretelling the return of the mighty cheddar, said to melt the hearts of all who taste it.

Prophecy 2: "The Robot Uprising Shall Not Happen" - A prophecy assuring the faithful that their toaster and blender shall never turn against them.

Prophecy 3: "The Coffee Shall Flow Like Rivers" - A prophecy foretelling the day when the coffee flows like the mighty Mississippi.