Office Hours with the Prophets

Welcome, mortals, to the office of the Prophets of the Apocalypse. Today's schedule is filled with doom and gloom.

• Fortunes of Famine - Come for the free bagels, stay for the dire predictions of a world where the apocalypse is just around the corner.
• Visions of Victory - Get a glimpse of the bright side, where the end of the world is just a distant memory (just kidding, it's not).
• Prophecies of Pizza - We're not just talking about the end of the world, we're talking about the toppings, the crust, the sauce.