The Rocking Chair of Doom - Artisanal Wares

Handcrafted by the Apocalypse's finest, for the discerning patron of destruction.

Featured Item: Apocalypse Survival Kit

A comprehensive collection of essentials for when the world ends.

Gas mask
Non-perishable snack food
Canned goods
Emergency contact information for your loved ones

Only $500, while supplies last.

Also, check out our limited edition Shark Repellent Spray!

Testimonials

Our customers rave:

"The Rocking Chair of Doom is the only thing that's kept me sane during the Apocalypse." - Bob, Local Survivalist
"I've bought 5 of them, and I'm not sorry." - Carol, Repeat Customer

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