DECREE OF THE APOCALYPSE

By the Prophets of the Apocalypse, in the year 2034.

ARTICLE I: The Apocalypse has Arrived.

WHEREAS the world as we knew it has been ravaged by climate change, pandemics, and reality TV, it is hereby decreed that the end is near.

ARTICLE II: The Prophets of the Apocalypse shall be in charge.

WHEREAS the Prophets have foreseen the coming of the apocalypse, it is hereby decreed that they shall be the sole rulers of the new world order.

Proclamations of the Prophets Decree Letters Announcements from the Mountaintop