Weekly Warning 1: Don't forget to restock the doomsday bunker's coffee supply. We can't have a successful apocalypse without caffeine.
Warning 2: The office's new "Survivalist-in-Chief" has been overheard practicing their "I'm the real hero" monologue in front of the mirror. Please report any suspicious behavior to HR.
Bulletin: The office fridge has been taken over by a mysterious, glowing substance. Do not attempt to consume it. Seriously, don't.