Conditioner of the Damned

Welcome to Prophets Socks, where the socks are a little too big for your feet, but the existential dread is just right.

We're not your average sock peddlers, no sir. Our socks are infused with the essence of the abyss, guaranteeing a 100% chance of mild anxiety and a 50/50 chance of spontaneous human combustion.

Socks Frequently Asked Questions About the Prophets Socks (Note: The links are to non-existent pages, but they're there for the sake of the narrative)