In response to the ever-present threat of existential dread, our top scientists have created Safety Protocol 6: The Infallible Safety Net. This protocol utilizes a combination of advanced AI, nanotechnology, and pure, unadulterated optimism to guarantee a 100% safety rate. Or does it?
This sub-protocol utilizes a complex system of neural networks and mood-enhancing pheromones to keep your existential dread at bay. But don't worry, we've taken every precaution to ensure that our AI system is completely trustworthy. Or have we?
Subprotocol B: Nanotechnology-based Safety NettingThis sub-protocol uses a mesh of ultra-dense nanoropes to create an impenetrable barrier between you and the crushing weight of reality. Side effects may include: temporary loss of free will, irreversible addiction to safety, and spontaneous combustion. But hey, it's worth it, right?
Subprotocol C: Optimism InjectionThis sub-protocol injects a carefully calibrated dose of pure, unadulterated optimism into your system, ensuring you're always looking on the bright side. Side effects may include: temporary blindness to reality, permanent loss of critical thinking, and spontaneous outbursts of 'I'm a winner!'
Subprotocol D: Reality DistortionThis sub-protocol warps the fabric of reality to create a personalized safety bubble around you. Side effects may include: mild cognitive dissonance, moderate existential dread, and spontaneous combustion. But hey, it's worth it, right?