Caffeine Rationing Proposal: A Most Excellent Idea

As you may know, our beloved nation has been plagued by an alarming rate of caffeine consumption. This has led to a plethora of problems, including (but not limited to) increased heart rates, decreased productivity, and an alarming rate of spontaneous combustion.

• Proposed Solution:
• Establish a national rationing system for caffeine.
• Implement a point-based system for caffeine rewards and penalties.
• Enforce strict limits on coffee shop hours of operation.

Under this system, citizens will be issued a monthly allowance of 10 cups of coffee. This will be tracked through a government-issued smart mug.

Each cup will be assigned a point value. Points can be traded for rewards, such as:

• Early bird special: 5 points for waking up before 6am.
• Mid-morning pick-me-up: 2 points for consuming coffee between 9am and 10am.
• Happy hour: 3 points for consuming coffee between 4pm and 5pm.

Points can also be penalized for:

• Excessive consumption: -5 points for consuming more than 2 cups in a 24 hour period.
• Sleeping in: -2 points for failing to wake up before 8am.

Our team of experts has calculated that this system will lead to a 50% reduction in caffeine-related problems.

Join us in our mission to save the nation from the dangers of caffeine addiction!

Learn more about the theoretical underpinnings of our rationing system. Find out how to apply the principles of Caffeineomics in your daily life. Discover the solutions we have to offer for those struggling with caffeine addiction.