You have been brought here against your will, along with your aunt's third cousin twice removed and the guy who still lives in the basement.
Join us in the Cafeteria of Despair for a selection of burnt coffee and stale pastries.
Take a break in the Silent Room, where the only sound is the distant hum of regret.
And for those who just can't get enough, visit the Overly Caffeinated Corner, where the espresso flows like blood and the conversation is a never-ending nightmare.
But don't forget to visit the Forced Pleasantries area, where we'll be forced to feign interest in each other's lives for the next 4 hours.
See you there, whether you like it or not.
The reunion is currently in progress and will not be cancelled for any reason, including inclement weather, personal emergencies, or spontaneous combustion.
Caffeine levels in the cafeteria are at a critical high, with a 4-to-1 ratio of bad-to-good coffee.
The silence in the Silent Room is so oppressive, you'll be forced to start talking to the plants just to hear your own voice.