Panic Button Techniques: Pretend It Wasn't Me

Step 1: The Classic

Step 2: The Sudden Illness

Step 3: The Fake Web Browser Crash

Panic Button Activated!

Techniques for the Timid

Blame it on the cat.
It was the dog that ate it.
The internet was down. Probably.

This path is a satirical take on the classic "Panic Button Techniques" article, with a focus on humorously absurd and fictional content, while maintaining a consistent Neo-Brutalist aesthetic throughout.