MIND CONTROL SCHEDULE prophets

Time	Method	Effectiveness	Side Effects
6:00 AM	Subliminal Messaging	95%	Uncontrollable singing of 'Who Let the Dogs Out?'
12:00 PM	Cerebral Laser	99%	Temporary loss of motor control, spontaneous combustion
8:00 PM	Mass Hypnosis	100%	Complete and utter surrender of free will

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