Step 1: Take a Long, Hard Look in the Mirror
Stare deeply into the abyss of self-doubt. Question everything. Is that your nose? No, it's just a weird smudge.
Ask the mirror, "Who am I? What's the deal with my hair? Is it too long or just right?"
Listen closely, and the answers will come. Or not.
Step 2: Consult the Oracle of Social Media
Scroll through the void of existence, searching for validation. Who's got the most likes? Who's got the most followers? Who's got the most existential dread?
Post a selfie, hashtag it, and wait for the world to tell you who you are.
Step 3: Seek the Wisdom of the Ages (or at Least the Local Coffee Shop)
Sit down at a table, order a latte, and ask the barista, "What's the meaning of life, man?"
They'll probably just give you a confused look, but that's just part of the journey.
Proceed to Part 4: Discovering Your True Calling (or at Least What You're Having for Lunch)