Self-Help for the Utterly Confused

Are you lost? Are you feeling like you've been put on a spinning wheel and someone's turned the dial to "confused"?

Here are a few tips:

1. Take a few deep breaths. It's like, 20 of them. You might feel better, or at least, not as confused.

2. Try counting to 10. But don't count past 10. It's like, a mental trick, okay?

3. Call your mom. She'll probably know what to do. Or at least, she'll listen to you complain.

Or... just pretend you're not confused at all. Just put a smile on your face, and a spring in your step, and a... well, that's about it.

But honestly, if you're really, really lost, just ask someone for help. We're all in this together, or something.