A: Of course not. Why do you think we're running a telepathic contact service? It's a black market, don't you know? Read the fine print if you dare.
A: We have an entire team of trained professionals standing by, ready to sort through the mental detritus. Get help now before it's too late!
A: Ah, no. That's just not how it works. We only hack brains for the highest bidder, and by "highest bidder" we mean the person who's most desperate. Check the rates and weep.