The Sloth-Napping Manifesto

By the great and powerful Sloth King, ruler of the couch, lord of the remote control, and sultan of the snooze button.

Article I: The Right to Indolence

  1. Every individual has the right to spend their days in the most comfortable position possible.
  2. Every individual has the right to prioritize their own needs, which shall not be infringed upon by external factors, such as alarm clocks, deadlines, or productivity expectations.
  3. Every individual has the right to dictate their own pace, which shall not be dictated by the whims of others.

Chapter 1: The Fundamentals of Indolence

Appendix: The Art of Procrastination