We, the undersigned, do hereby declare that snacks are not just a right, but a NECESSITY for human survival.
We, the undersigned, do hereby assert that the current state of snack availability is ABYSMAL and must be rectified forthwith.
We call upon all governments, institutions, and snack manufacturers to recognize the inherent RIGHT TO SNACK and provide adequate, delicious, and varied snack options to all citizens at all times.
Failure to comply will result in THE GREAT SNACK STRIKE OF [YEAR]
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