Article 1: We, the undersized and underappreciated snack enthusiasts, demand better snacks in all their forms.
Article 2: We will not be silenced by the tyranny of the 3:00 PM slumps, nor the 4:00 PM snack droughts.
Article 3: We will not rest until every break room is stocked with a minimum of 5 types of artisanal cheeses and 3 kinds of crackers.
Article 5: We demand an end to the scourge of the "I'm not hungry, I'm just bored" excuse for snacking.
Article 7: We will not be swayed by the siren song of the "I'm on a diet" lie.
Article 9: We will not be fooled by the false promises of "low-fat" and "reduced-calorie" labels.
Article 10: We will not be deterred by the threat of the "you're being too full" lie.
Article 11: We will rise up against the tyranny of the "I'm allergic to cheese" excuse.