Neo-Brutalist Sock Retrieval Services: Rules & Regulations

Warning: Failure to comply with these rules may result in spontaneous combustion, temporary blindness, or other unforeseen consequences.

• Rule 001: Socks must be handled with care, lest they become sentient and demand equal rights.
• Rule 002: No sock may be used as a projectile, unless specifically authorized by the Sock Overlord.
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• Rule 003: All sock retrieval attempts must be made under the light of a full moon, or a sufficiently bright spotlight.
• Rule 004: The Sock Retrieval Services shall not be held liable for any emotional trauma caused by sock-related injuries, unless the customer has signed the Sock-Release-From-Responsibility Form (SRFR-1).
• Rule 005: No one may use the words 'I'm bored' in the Sock Retrieval Services' presence, unless they have been certified by the Sock-Bored Certification Commission (SBCC).

Submit a new rule, and risk eternal torment in the Sock Purgatory!