Prophets of the Justifications

Welcome to the most prestigious order of prophets, seers, and soothsayers.

Our prophets are experts in justifying the most absurd and illogical situations. They have spent years studying the art of justifying why the sky is pink, why cats wear hats, and why pineapple pizza is the best.

Click below to learn more about our prophets:

Justifying the Unjustifiable

Our Prophets' Masterclass

Join our prophets on a journey of self-discovery and justification. Learn the art of justifying why the sky is green, why chickens wear roller skates, and why the square root of 16 is 24.

Cost: $1000 per hour. Discounts available for students, seniors, and the terminally confused.

Sign up now by clicking here.