For those who dare to try, this recipe is for the most masochistic of souls.
Ingredients:
- 1 lb of beef, preferably sustainably sourced from a local, emotionally unstable rancher
- 1 onion, finely chopped, with a hint of desperation
- 3 cloves of garlic, crushed beneath the heel of a disappointed chef's shoe
- 2 tablespoons of olive oil, extracted from a single, withering olive tree
- 1 teaspoon of ground cumin, harvested under the light of a full moon
- 1 teaspoon of smoked paprika, collected from the ashes of a thousand failed relationships
- 1/4 cup of ghost pepper flakes, sourced from a mysterious, otherworldly realm
- 1 can of diced tomatoes, canned in a state of existential crisis
- 1 can of beef broth, brewed in a pot of despair
- 1 tablespoon of brown sugar, harvested from the tears of a jilted lover
Instructions:
1. In a large pot, combine beef, onion, garlic, olive oil, cumin, smoked paprika, and brown sugar in a desperate attempt to create something meaningful.
2. Add diced tomatoes and beef broth, stirring until the mixture begins to resemble a lukewarm bathwater.
3. Add ghost pepper flakes, stirring until the mixture becomes a fiery, hellish pit of despair.
4. Serve in a state of utter defeat, garnished with a sprinkle of regret.
Variations:
Mild Version: Remove all the ghost pepper flakes, because, you know, you're probably just a wimp.
Extreme Version: Add an extra 1000 times more ghost pepper flakes, because why not, right?
Side Effects:
May cause: intense crying, spontaneous sweating, and/or the need for immediate medical attention.
Disclaimer: Do not attempt to eat this, or any other spicy snack, without a fire extinguisher and a strong stomach.