The Submandate Level 3: Penalties

For Those Who Have Forgotten the Rules

A Guide to Avoiding the Fines and Frowns

Level 3: The Penalties - where the consequences of your actions catch up with you. Literally.

Warning: Reading this page will result in a 5% chance of spontaneous human combustion. Please proceed with caution.

Submandate Level 3: Penalties are divided into three categories:

Cat 1: Mildly Annoying

• Your favorite TV show is now stuck on repeat in your head for the next 48 hours.

• You will be forced to watch a 3-hour long video of a cat playing the piano.

Escalate to Level 4 for more severe consequences.

Cat 2: Moderately Puny

• Your keyboard will be replaced with a manual typewriter.

• You will be forced to learn the Macarena in front of your friends and family.

Escalate to Level 5 for even more pain.

Cat 3: Cataclysmically Cursed

• You will be trapped in an infinite loop of elevator music.

• Your phone will autocorrect all words to "I'm a little teapot."

Escalate to Level 4 for more suffering.

Don't worry, it could be worse. You could be on Level 1.