Existential Crisis Theories

Warning: the following content may cause existential dread and/or spontaneous combustion.

1. The Infinite Locus of Control Theory

Also known as "I'm a tiny boat on the ocean of existence, and I'm just trying not to get wet."

According to this theory, the universe is just a vast, uncaring expanse, and you're just a tiny, insignificant speck on its surface.

But don't worry, it's not all bad! You can still make a difference... or can you?

2. The Simulation Hypothesis of Nothingness

It's like, what if everything we experience is just a simulation created by a bored AI in a lab somewhere?

Are we just NPCs in a never-ending video game of existence?

3. The Nothingness Paradox of Socks

What happens when a sock goes missing?

Is it a metaphor for the meaninglessness of life, or just a reminder that you're a slob?