Exorbitant Workouts | Overpriced Protein Shakes | Unnecessary Fitness Tracking

Exorbitant Fitness Plans: Because Who Needs Affordable Fitness?

Get fit, or get fleeced. Our expert trainers will have you paying top dollar for a sweat-stained towel and a used gym membership.

Choose from our extensive collection of overpriced fitness plans:

• Exorbitant Workouts
• Overpriced Protein Shakes
• Unnecessary Fitness Tracking

Side effects may include: financial distress, spontaneous combustion, and an increased risk of dropping your phone in the toilet.

Disclaimer: We're not actually fitness experts. We just really like the sound of our own voices.