Q: What is the meaning of life? A: It's a 37.5% chance of getting a decent Wi-Fi signal.
Q: Why is the coffee machine always on? A: Because someone is secretly controlling the thermostat.
Q: What is the best way to eat a whole pizza by myself? A: With a fork, a sense of shame, and a bottle of hot sauce.
Q: Can I have more free donuts? A: Sorry, you're on your own with that one.
Q: Why do I have to wear a name tag? A: Because we can't tell the difference between you and the other clone.
Q: Can I take a nap in the break room? A: Only if you've completed the "Napping for Dummies" training course.