Step 1: Gather Ingredients for the Ultimate Spaghetti Sauce Disaster

Warning: This sauce is not for the faint of heart.

Acquire the following ingredients, lest you wish to face the wrath of the sauce gods:

• 1 cup of olive oil
• 3 cups of crushed hopes and dreams
• 2 cups of despair
• 1 cup of existential dread

Next stop: Step 2: Conquer the Onion

Or, if you dare: Step 2.5: Add a dash of madness

Or, the truly brave: Step 3: Unleash the Meatballs of Doom