Algorithmic Procrastination

Where the only thing more efficient than doing the job is not doing the job.

Our Services

• Doing the Minimum - Where we take the most complex tasks and break them down into tiny, insurmountable tasks.
• Procrastinating in Circles - Our patented technique for getting stuck in an infinite loop, while still appearing productive.
• Optimizing for Nothing - We'll take your code and make it do less, but with more flair.

Our Team

• Meet Bob, Our Antithetical Expert - He'll show you the most inefficient way to do everything.
• Meet Carol, Our Sophisticated Procrastinator - She'll show you the art of making the most complicated thing simple, then complicating it again.

Testimonials

We've been praised by clients who've never actually gotten anything done, but loved the time they spent thinking about it.

"This is the most productive thing I've ever not gotten done." - John D.

"I've never been more efficient at doing nothing!" - Jane S.

Don't just take our word for it, though. We've got a metrics page where we track the most creative ways our services have saved the day.