We're here to help, but only if you really, really need it.
Our team of highly trained, moderately competent experts will do their best to answer your questions, but no promises.
Don't bother asking us for help with math homework, though. That's just not our thing.
Or, if you do ask, we'll just pretend to do the math and tell you what you want to hear. Shh, it'll be our little secret.
Throw a Very Loud Wobbly Tell the Chicken to Shut Up