Assurance 12: The Official Bureaucratic Lingo Guide

Definitions

• Procrustesque (adj.) - Relating to the art of making something sound good while looking good.
• Beeble (noun) - A unit of bureaucratic time.
• Flumplen (verb) - To make something sound more complicated than it needs to be.

Key Concepts

• The Bureaucratic Loop - A never-ending cycle of paperwork and meetings.
• Red Tape Management - The art of making progress by moving slowly and deliberately in all directions.
• The Ministry Shuffle - A game of bureaucratic musical chairs, where everyone moves when the music stops, except on Fridays.

Example Use Cases

• Form 3456: Request for Additional Information - A form designed to elicit unnecessary data.
• The Meeting That Could Have Been an Email - A meeting that could have been resolved with a single sentence, but instead, it was a 30-minute ordeal.
• The Report That Wasn't Due Yesterday - A report that was promised yesterday, but is still pending due to "unforeseen circumstances."