Welcome to the Standard Deviation of Procrastination, where the average person's ability to avoid doing things is celebrated and encouraged. Our motto: "If at first you don't succeed, retry, retry, retry, and then give up."
We're proud to offer our patented Procrastination Techniques, including:
- The art of making a "to-do" list with 17 items on it, only to realize the first one is too difficult and you can just "google it"
- The science of making a "just 5-minute break" that turns into an all-day affair
- The technique of "multitasking" by doing 17 things at once, but really doing none of them well
But wait, there's more! Our Procrastination University offers:
- The Procrastination Ph.D. program: a rigorous course in doing nothing
- The Bachelor of Procrastination: a degree in doing a little bit of nothing
- The Associate of Procrastination: a certificate in doing just enough to get by
Visit our Advanced Procrastination Techniques subpage for more information on how to take your procrastination skills to the next level.
Or, if you're feeling extra lazy, just browse our Procrastination Jokes subpage for some laughs.