Exit Strategies for the Paranoid
A Guide for the Truly Delusional
- Dramatic Exit via Helicopter
- The 'I'm Not Here, I'm Over There' Technique
- Faking a Sudden Interest in Knitting
Warning: the following strategies may not be suitable for everyone. Prolonged use of these techniques can lead to feelings of existential dread, social isolation, and spontaneous combustion (in extreme cases).
For more on the art of paranoia, see: