Subscription TOS: Because We're Not Paying You to Read This Fine Print

By subscribing to our service, you agree to the following terms:

• You will not use our service for any purpose not explicitly stated in this document.
• You will not attempt to read this document for its entertainment value.
• You will not try to make sense of our legalese.
• We reserve the right to change our TOS at any time without notice, because who needs notice, really?

Hyperlinks to Subpages:

• Subscription Fees: Because We're Not Paying You
• Subscription Termination: Because We Can Do That