The Art of Faking It: A Guide to Pretending to Be a Decent Human

By When in Doubt, Just Go With It

The 7-11 Rule: A Guide to Pretending to Like Everything

• The Faking It Technique: A Step-by-Step Guide
• Practice Your Fakes: A Drill for the Desperate
• Advanced Faking Topics: From Small Talk to Sarcasm

Step 1: The Faking It Technique

Step 1: Smile, nod, and pretend to care.

• Smile: A 30-degree smile is the key to faking it.
• Nod: A slow, deliberate nod says "I'm paying attention, but not too much."
• Pretend to care: "Wow, that's soooo interesting."

Step 2: Practice Your Fakes

Practice makes perfect, or so they say.

• Start with small talk: "The weather is nice today."
• Move on to sarcasm: "Oh, great, another exciting meeting."
• Work your way up to complex fakes: "I love your tie, it really brings out the colors in your shirt."

Step 3: Advanced Faking Topics

When you've mastered the basics, it's time to get fancy.

• Small talk: "I'm so sorry I'm late, traffic was a nightmare."
• Sarcasm: "Wow, I'm so glad I have to do this meeting again this week."
• Advanced topics: "I'm really enjoying the synergy in this meeting, it's so... synergistic."