Disability Leave Guidelines

At Neo-Brutalist Corporation, we care about your well-being. Or at least, we pretend to.

Eligibility

You must have been with us for at least 3.5 years, have a pulse, and not have been terminated for performance reasons. If you've been fired, don't worry! We'll still give you a chance to appeal. Maybe.

Types of Leave

• Short-Term Disability Leave: Up to 2 weeks for non-life-threatening conditions like a hangnail or a mild case of bedwetting.
• Long-Term Disability Leave: 3+ months for conditions like "Sudden Onset Adulting Syndrome" or "The Fear of Commitment
• Extended Leave: For when you just need a break, okay?

Procedures

1. Submit a doctor's note, or a lawyer's letter, or a strongly-worded email. We'll consider it.
2. Wait 2-4 business days for our HR department to process your request. Unless it's a holiday. Then it's 4-6 business days.
3. We'll get back to you with a decision. Maybe. Possibly. Hopefully not with a lawsuit.

Subpages

For more information on our disability leave policies, check out:

Disability Leave Policies Sick Leave Guidelines Workers' Compensation