By order of the Fanny Pack Overlord, the following items are strictly forbidden:
1. Fanny packs with built-in speakers that blast "Who Let the Dogs Out?" on repeat
2. Fanny packs that resemble actual animal heads
3. Fanny packs with more than 5 pockets (you're not that extra)
4. Fanny packs that can be used as a weapon (we're looking at you, "Fanny Pack of Justice")
Offenders will be subject to the following penalties:
Public shaming on the Fanny Pack Overlord's Instagram
Forced viewing of a never-ending loop of cat videos
Removal of all fanny pack privileges for a minimum of 30 days
Don't say we didn't warn you.