Zero-Tolerance Protocol: When to Report

Reporting Guidelines

When in doubt, report. Repeat, report, report.

If you witness any of the following egregious offenses:

• Sudden interest in a coworker's stapler
• Visible caffeine intake during work hours
• Natural hair colors not approved by management

Call the Zero-Tolerance Hotline: 1-800-NO-TOLERANCE

Please note that our zero-tolerance policy is in effect 24/7, even on holidays.

Disclaimer

By reporting these offenses, you are acknowledging that you have read, understood, and consented to our zero-tolerance policy. If you have any questions or concerns, please direct them to our HR department. Or don't. We don't really care.

Frequently Asked Questions