Rule 1: When attending a gallery opening, do not compliment the artwork unless you have a good reason to.
Rule 2: Never, ever, ever use the word "relatable" in a review.
Rule 3: When asking a curator about the inspiration behind a piece, make sure to have a strong stomach.
Rule 4: Do not attempt to purchase a piece that has been deliberately destroyed by its creator.
Want more? Check out our other guides on Gallery Protocol or Neo-Brutalist Philosophy.