Parasocial identity disorder: the ultimate existential crisis of the internet age.
1. Social media addiction: endless scrolling, liking, and commenting on the lives of others.
2. Fear of real human connection: too many online relationships, not enough real ones.
3. Inability to differentiate between self and online persona: are you a person, or are you just a profile?
4. Obsession with curated perfection: comparing your life to others' highlight reels.
5. Inability to cope with FOMO (fear of missing out): the constant anxiety of not being on every trending topic.