We've got this, but not in a good way
Are you tired of your parents asking to play bingo at the crack of noon? Do you have a significant other with a Ph.D. in 'I told you to take them to the doctor last week'?
- We'll provide you with the most expensive, least comprehensive policies available
- Our consultants will pretend to care, but secretly be counting down the minutes until you put them in a home for seniors
- We have an A+ rating from the 'We're Not Really A Fan Of Our Parents' Association
Don't just take out a policy, take out our 30-year loan with 12% interest and a 'grandma's gonna live forever' clause. We've got a special offer just for you!