Justifications for the CEO's Decisions (a series)

As the CEO, I am the sole decision-maker of this company. And by "sole decision-maker," I mean that I get to decide what's for lunch.

Justification 1: The coffee machine is always broken, so I must be the one to decide when it's fixed.

See also: The Employees' Justifications for Not Fixing the Coffee Machine

Justification 2: The foosball table is the best investment opportunity this company has ever seen.

Read about the Foosball Table's impressive ROI

Justification 3: I'm pretty sure the company's stock would tank if I didn't have a foosball table in the break room.

What happens if we lose at foosball?

More CEO Justifications