09:00 - 09:30 AM: Breakfast of Champions
Free food, coffee, and existential dread. Come for the free food, stay for the existentialประก
- Free pancakes with extra syrup
- Free coffee with an open barista policy
- Free therapy sessions with a team of highly trained professionals
Meet at the conference room for a morning of free food and forced socialization.
Next Item: Safety Briefing
09:30 - 10:00 AM: Safety Briefing
ประก
- Review of last week's office fridge contents
- Discussion of emergency exit routes
- Introduction to the fire drill procedure
Please note that last week's fridge contents are still a mystery, so be prepared for surprises.
Next Item: Icebreaker
10:00 - 10:30 AM: Icebreaker
Get to know your coworkers while simultaneously getting to know each other better than you ever thought possible.
- Guess who's had a nervous breakdown in a public place
- Guess who's prophets are in check
- Guess who's been secretly building a time machine in their garage
Next Item: Team Building Philosophy
10:30 - 11:00 AM: Team Building Philosophy
The meaning of life, the universe, and the conference room table.
- The meaning of the free food in the break room
- The meaning of the stapler on your desk
- The meaning of the meeting itself
It's all connected, you'll see.
Next Item: Team Building Activities
11:00 - 11:30 AM: Team Building Activities
Fun and games, or just fun and awkward silence.
- Trust falls with a team of highly trained professionals
- Group trust falls with a team of highly trained professionals who are all secretly terrified of heights
- A game of 'Who Can Eat the Most Cereal in One Sitting'
Meet at the conference room for a morning of team bonding and questionable decisions.
Next Item: Team Building Wrap-Up
11:30 - 12:00 PM: Team Building Wrap-Up
A final review of the morning's events, and a chance to reflect on your new found appreciation for the conference room chairs.
- Aประก
- A review of the free food and its impact on your soul
- A discussion of the team-building philosophy and its application in the real world
Don't forget to sign out and take your free lunch!