By using our patented, totally-not-at-all-scientifically-sound techniques, our team of expert mind-wrestlers will help you achieve the ultimate goal of making others do what you want, without actually having to, you know, actually do anything.
Neuro Laser Techniques for maximum mind control. Or, if you're feeling adventurous: Implantable Mind Chips - because who needs personal space, anyway?Side effects of mental mass manipulation may include:
We're not responsible for any mental (or physical) harm caused by our services. Please use at your own risk.
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