Advanced Mind-Reading Techniques for the Utterly Inept

Are you tired of being clueless? Want to know what others think about you when you're not around? Look no further! Our advanced mind-reading techniques will give you unparalleled insight into the thoughts and feelings of those around you.

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But be warned: our methods are not for the faint of heart. You may find yourself questioning your entire existence after reading the thoughts of those around you.

Side Effects May Include:

Involuntary facepalming
Existential dread
Uncontrollable urges to scream 'WHAT DO YOU SEE IN ME?!'

We are not responsible for any mental trauma caused by our mind-reading services.

Proceed with caution, or better yet, with a strong stomach.