Mini-Panic-Room Escape Protocols

Escape Artist's Manual

For those times when you find yourself trapped in a standard issue panic room, follow these expertly crafted protocols to increase your chances of survival.

• Protocol 2: The Art of Distracting the Guard with Socks
• Protocol 5: Using Your Wits (or a Really Long Stick)
• Protocol 8: The Power of Positive Thinking (and a Well-Placed Fake Exit)
• Protocol 11: Infiltrating the Enemy with a Well-Timed Disco Party

Remember: a good escape plan is like a good joke – it's only funny until someone gets hurt.