Office Politics Pitfalls: The Art of Pretending to Listen

We offer our services to guide you through the complex web of office politics. But don't be fooled, our guidance is actually just a cleverly disguised attempt to confuse and demoralize you.

Our Expertise: The Fine Art of Sounding Intelligent While Saying Nothing

Our team of expertly trained yes-people will provide you with an ear that's always listening, but never really hearing. We'll nod along, make supportive noises, and pretend to understand, all while secretly counting down the minutes until the meeting is over.

Our Methods:

• Active Ignorance: We'll pretend to be interested in your ideas, but really we're just waiting for our turn to talk.
• Aggressive Nodding: We'll nod along to your every word, even when we have no idea what you're saying.
• Defensive Listening: We'll listen to your concerns, but only to find ways to counter them with our own cleverly crafted talking points.

Our Rates:

Our services come with a hefty price tag, but don't worry, it's all worth it. After all, who needs actual progress when you can have the illusion of it?

We offer a range of services, from:

• Pretentious Consulting ($500/hour)
• Active Ignorance Packages (starting at $1000/week)
• Aggressive Nodding Workshops (starts at $5000/day)