This is the most isolated, most inaccessible place on earth. The walls are 50 feet high, the moat is 50 feet wide, and the only sound is the echo of your own despair.
You've been here for 3 years now, and you've seen no one. No mail, no visitors, no escape. Just you, the walls, and the slowly growing beard.
Want to see your cellmate? Mystery Meat is a nice guy. He's been here even longer than you.
Or, if you're feeling brave, you can try to Escape through the only exit, a door hidden behind a 10-foot-tall stack of paperwork.