Our Guarantee: Because Your Sanity Matters

At Our Guarantee, we promise to make your life easier, one absurd guarantee at a time.

Our Promise

We will:

• We will not make you watch cat videos for 24 hours straight.
• We will not force you to listen to elevator music on repeat.
• We will not turn your toaster into a sentient, judgmental being.
• We will not replace all your furniture with whoopee cushions.

What's Not Covered

We're not responsible for any damage caused by:

• Your own ineptitude.
• Ancient curses that have been awakened by our guarantee.
• The apocalypse.

Side Effects

You may experience:

• Spontaneous happiness.
• Increased productivity.
• A sense of accomplishment.

Subpages:

Our Guarantee Terms and Conditions

Our Guarantee Warranty

Our Guarantee Claim