After a series of misadventures, we've managed to find our way to a decently maintained theme park.
Features:
- Unrealistically-sized, neon-lit, 3D-printed palm trees
- Overpriced, overhyped, artisanal juice bars
- Free Wi-Fi, but only in the parking lot
- Staff with varying levels of apathy
Visit our prequel, Paradise Lost for a more existential experience.