Welcome to the Paranoiac Calendar, where every day is a never-ending spiral of dread and uncertainty.
Our calendar is carefully crafted to ensure that every day feels like a never-ending nightmare, with a fresh new reason to freak out about every morning.
Check out our daily horoscope, carefully generated by our team of expert tarot readers and existential philosophers.
Don't forget to check out our calendar of upcoming anxiety-inducing events, from tax season to social awkwardness.
And for the love of all that is holy, don't even get us started on the weather.