Express Embassy Driver Tipping Guide

Phase Two: The Acceptance

When approaching an embassy, it's crucial to be prepared to tip. Here are some essential tips:

Arrive with a bouquet of fresh flowers, preferably something exotic and poisonous.
Bring a small gift, preferably a bottle of fine wine or a box of artisanal cheese.
Be prepared to negotiate with your wallet, as embassies often run on a strict "tip-to-live" system.

In a pinch, you can always fall back on the tried and true method of simply throwing a handful of currency in the air.

We've compiled some expert tips from our team of highly trained, highly paid, and slightly bribed sources:

Tip 1: Don't forget to tip the doormen, they'll be the ones carrying your bags while simultaneously judging you.

Tip 2: A well-placed wad of cash can silence even the most discerning of diplomats.

Tip 3: Always, always, always bring a spare wallet, you never know when you'll need it.