I will finally learn to make proper toast. No more burnt offerings to the culinary deities.
I will drink an entire bottle of hot sauce in one sitting, but only if it's a dare.
I will reorganize my sock drawer into a rainbow-colored gradient of orderliness.
I will write a strongly worded letter to my in-laws, explaining why they're wrong.
See last year's resolutions, because you know they didn't go so well Get the essential resolutions for the truly dedicated